Pride

Happy Pride month everyone 🏳️‍🌈 My Husband and I are not usually ones to celebrate Pride. It’s not that we don’t see its importance, it’s just that we believe that (in this country at least), we’re mostly accepted without judgement. And once this is achieved, the next step is integration. Meaning that it’s no longer a ‘thing’. That’s ultimate acceptance, when we’re no longer different to any other person expressing their sexuality or gender. We just ‘are’, like everyone else.

However, we fully recognise the struggle, trauma and sacrifice that fellow queer people have gone through, and the reason that Pride exists in the first place. It’s a hugely important part of our history. So in the theme of the month, here are some things I feel ‘pride’ for…

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that I have a family who accepts me

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that I live in a country that accepts me

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that I am able to have a Husband

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that we are able to have children

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that my children get to grow up in a home where they understand that love is love

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud of all the amazing Queer people in my life and my children’s lives

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that gender identity is being challenged

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud of my daughter who, at such a young age, feels safe to express her gender queerness

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud that pop culture has showcased so much Queer talent that it’s now becoming the ‘norm’

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud of all those who suffered and sacrificed to allow these things to happen

🏳️‍🌈 I feel proud of all my straight, cis-gender friends, family and clients who lovingly support us

If you’re reading this as a straight, cis-gender person, you may recognise that most of the points above you’ve never had to consider in your life. And that’s truly what Pride is about. Taking a moment to recognise the things that go unrecognised by most of society.

For us, we’ve wanted to relocate country for many years. Aside from the usual immigration challenges, our biggest consideration has been finding a country that will accept us as a same-sex family with adopted children. As you know, my Husband is Greek, but Greece isn’t an option for us. While they’ve recently legalised same-sex marriage, it’s still an incredibly homophobic environment. When I tell people this, they are often shocked. Because most people would never see or consider this when they go on their holidays to Greece. We always have to consider our holidays. There are many places we can’t go in the world.

When we were adopting, we had to volunteer with young children to gain experience. It’s amazing how many places rejected us, and when we finally secured a placement (at a church), after our first session (once they found out we were a couple) we were paused and asked to be DBS checked. We understand the need for these checks, but nobody else volunteering there was asked to have these checks. My husband was also physically stopped from entering the church building upon trying to return to his volunteering, despite being a teacher will the highest DBS check. Again, these are things that most people never have to consider.

We’ve only recently been permitted to give blood, and even then the rules are different to that of a straight person.

When I was 17, I was heckled while washing my car, then attacked in the street for being gay. When I was 18, my friend was attacked with a glass bottle, had his throat slashed and nearly died. My other friend committed suicide in his early 20s.

So while we’re mostly accepted in the Western World, and times have moved on since I was a teenager, there is still a need for Pride.

Pride isn’t for queer people, it’s for straight, cis-gender people. It’s to help them understand our struggles and learn that we’re all just human.

Love is love, gender is nobody else’s business but your own.

What are you proud of? 🏳️‍🌈